Hookie – Dumb TV – Dumb Americans – Passports

I didn’t go to work today because I like 3-day weekends and because I had shit to do. I had to go get a new driver’s license and social security card in my real name so that I can renew my passport, which is already in my real name. It was a record. I finished at the MVA and SSA in less than an hour TOTAL! I know. The heavens are smiling upon me.

I also watched about 20 minutes of the most disgusting show on cable — The Millionaire Matchmaker. It is the epitome of all things whack, shallow and moronic about this materialistic capitalist culture that’s driving me insane in America. I couldn’t take it after her tirade about straightening curly hair and getting extensions because that’s all “they” want to see; they want something they can run their hands through — no Brillo. No Brillo?!?!? And she was talking to a curly-haired white woman. So this was gold-diggers meet millionairs ISO gold-diggers. It was disgusting. But to each his own, I suppose. (That’s supposed to negate the judgment I chose to express in the previous sentence.)

So, I have a question. Do you have a passport? If so, tell me about your stamps. I have only had mine stamped in Argentina and Chile. All other countries I’ve visited didn’t require passports for US citizens. But the times they are a’changin’, so get one if you haven’t already.

Where have you traveled?

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On A Lighter Note…

Thank you for all of your comments on my previous 2 posts, but now I must ground my feet to the earth again and talk about silliness.  Don’t want to lose my cynics!

I am traveling to Atlanta next week for work and hopefully to hang out with the great and wonderful Jali.  I am looking forward to doing some fun things in the ATL besides sitting around in bars getting drunk with my co-workers.  I’m so over my co-workers.  Have you noticed?  Any ideas?  I know I’m going to have super-long days, but I still want to take advantage of being in a great city.  Oh, and did I mention I have a limited budget?  No?  Well, I do.  So keep that in mind when you make your suggestions.

I took a yoga class last night and I really had a hard time with the Shavasana.  The pose is for deep relaxation.  The room is completely quite and still.  Everyone is focused on their breathing and you can’t hear anything at all.  But I had to fart—bad!  I was trying so hard to hold it in and I knew it was one that was not going to come out quietly.  Trying to hold it in and hearing my stomach rumble only made me want to laugh.  Needing to laugh in an inappropriate situation makes me pee.  Can you see that I was in trouble?!?!  I was so close to farting and peeing on myself simultaneously.  I was so glad to hear that damned gong to signal that that mess was over!  But right after the gong sounded, I swear the instructor farted.  Must have been all those forward bends and twists.

OK, Lovelies.  What shall I do in ATL?